Whenever I talk to women about the subject of romance, I hear the same thing. "But he
should be the one to be romantic." I understand what they are saying, but the truth is most men
are not going to be a romantic as their wives. (There are exceptions to this, of course.)
I think the main reason is that men compartmentalize so much of their lives. Picture a man's mind
like a home with a lot of rooms. There is a room for work, one for the house, one for the kids, and
one for the wife. (You can guess what room that probably is.) If a husband is spending all his time
in the "work" room, he's not in the "wife" room, so he's not thinking about her specifically. It doesn't
mean he doesn't think of his wife, but it does mean that he's not making the effort at that moment
to be romantic. He won't come out of the room he's in, until his work there is done or something
entices him to do so, since men are also very task oriented.
Many women, on the other hand, think of romance throughout the day. They may watch it on
television, read romance novels, and think about ways they'd like to please their husbands. In
despair, they will whine to their husbands about the lack of romance. The husband, then, might do
something like bring flowers home and think that he's got that item checked off on his list to do.
He's missed the point entirely and the wife is left feeling like her needs haven't been met.
Here's a little secret. If you want more romance in your life, you will probably have to be one to
instigate it. After all, Matt.7:12 says "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you." It's not a
promise that Mr. Non-romantic will suddenly be showering your bed with rose petals, but it may
"teach" him what you would really like.
Romancing the Home
But he's the one who should be romantic . . .
Romance is Fun!
Changing the way you think about romance is the first step. Instead of it being some way for
your husband to show you how much you mean to him, it becomes a way to express your love
and to have fun with your spouse.
Every month, this site will have a new set of tasteful, fun, tried and true romantic ideas to share.
Try a few and see if you don't enjoying giving as much as you do receiving.
- There's nothing like taking
a walk on a brisk fall
evening. Be sure to hold
- Attend a high school
football game together
even if you don't have any
students who attend
there. It'll bring back some
- Each of you pick out a
surprise movie. Then,
play a game of Rock,
Paper, Scissors. The
winner gets to watch
his/her movie. Of course,
the looser can barter to
|-Inspirational author and speaker